A THOUSAND DOLLARS
By George B. Curtis
If I had a lot of money,
That I wished to give away,
Id call upon my preacher friends
A little test I’d lay.
I’d call them all together,
And explain to them a plan,
Whereby a thousand dollars
Would be given to each man.
The plan it would be simple,
Anyone could get it straight;
The language would be a paraphrase
Of Acts two thirty-eight.
Theyd ask of me, What shall we do?
I’d answer them as follows:
“Be baptized, each one of you,
For a thousand silver dollars.”
My Baptist friend would shed his coat,
And cease his “because-of” prattle;
He’d know the meaning of this “for”
When he heard the silver rattle.
Friend Methodist, too, without a doubt,
This “for” could understand,
If the understanding meant for him
A thousand smackers in his hand.
Friend Nazarene and all the clan
Who Holiness doctrine teach,
Presbyterian and all the rest
Would to the water reach.
Not one of them would argue back
And you can write it down,
Within thirty minutes, there’d not be
A dry preacher in the town.
June 30, 2015