Questions to Use in Premarital Counseling

Premarital Counseling is very important to those planning to wed. Marriage is a complex concept and if we’re going to do it well, we need guidance from someone with the training and knowledge to help us. These questions help facilitate these goals. Some or all can be used for these purposes.

With the couple before me, I have them fill these questionnaires out separately and then we discuss them together. Marriage brings people of diverse experiences and teachings together and these questions help them see what they know and whether they’re truly compatible.

In doing so, we can steer them to Scripture and give them spiritual guidance along the way. However, many of these questions are of a practical nature and cover subjects most couples never consider before their nuptials.

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#counseling, #marriage, #ministry, #premarital-counseling, #wedding

Listening can mean more than speaking

I’ve heard it told that a teacher once asked a student to sum up Socrates’ life in four lines. The student replied with: 1. Socrates lived long ago. 2. He was very intelligent. 3. Socrates gave long speeches. 4. His friends poisoned him.

If you didn’t know any better after studying that list, one might think Socrates’ death was connected to his “gift” of drawn-out gab.

All humorous illustrations aside, there are times in life when we need to remember that listening to others can mean more to them than speaking. This doesn’t mean that truth must take a backseat to indifference when it comes to giving advice. It only means that to some people, listening ears equates to a caring heart as much as good advice given does to other people. And when a person knows how much you care, then they will be more interested in what you know.

The hearing ear and the seeing eye, the Lord has made them both.” (Proverbs 20:12)

#caring, #conversation, #counseling, #listening

Nudge: welcome advice

We’ve not had a Nudge in a long time, so here goes one for you. What advice do you wish you’d received before you needed it?

Advice is usually considered something unwelcome. Let’s think about a piece of advice that we would have been glad to have received, perhaps helping us to avoid a mistake or live on a higher plane.


#advice, #counseling, #mistakes, #wisdom

Premarital Counseling

If you need help with material to use in performing premarital counseling, I have put some of my questions and links on my blog.

#counseling, #marriage, #premarital-counseling, #romance, #sex

Today’s Daily Nudge asks the Fellows to…

Today’s Daily Nudge asks the Fellows to share some recent advice they gave to a Christian.

After a recent meeting of the SJC church here, a brother rose on his own initiative and stated his opinion that we’d have problems in a project we were considering. His comments were extensive. This is a brother who consistently sees the downside to opportunities. So I rebuked him publicly, which I almost never do. I told him that in order to bring before the church an issue, he needed to have facts and data, not an opinion. He was throwing a bucket of cold water on the project. I was stern and when he tried to insist, I overrode him by raising my voice somewhat, but not yelling. I have never done that before. Some of the brethren may have been taken back by it. Afterwards, I treated this brother normally, with no rancor nor resentment.

Perhaps we will decide the project is not for us; that will be fine. I do not feel strongly about it one way or the other. But we must, at least, give it a chance to go forward by a judicious consideration of our situation. Otherwise, naysayers will keep us from ever doing anything.

#advice, #counseling