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  • Eugene Adkins 6:35 pm on 2017-03-16 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , parenting,   

    Beauty and the … Earth Beast 

    Don’t fail as Christian parents by bringing your children to see Disney’s latest remake of “Beauty and the Beast.” (More …)

  • Eugene Adkins 7:09 pm on 2017-02-13 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , parenting   

    What are some ways a father can provoke their child to wrath? 

    Last week’s Gospel Advocate Foundations course (Adult Bible Study) discussed Ephesians 6:1-9.

    This section of scripture includes the admonition to fathers which says,

    “… fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.” (Ephesians 6:4 NKJV)

    After asking the provided question in the booklet for this verse, the class teacher followed up with his own question. I believe his question was/is a very important one. He asked, (More …)

  • Eugene Adkins 3:14 pm on 2017-01-05 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , parenting, ,   

    What would you say if you were asked this by your child? 

    Last night, on our way to Bible study, we ended up driving part of the way behind a random driver (after pulling onto the road behind him). For some reason, one that only a young child could understand, my daughter asked, (More …)

    • J. Randal Matheny 5:44 pm on 2017-01-05 Permalink | Reply

      Great application.

    • Ocimar Luiz Anizelli 4:57 am on 2017-01-06 Permalink | Reply

      I would probably say how aimless my life would be Like without his presence in my life.

      • Eugene Adkins 5:32 pm on 2017-01-10 Permalink | Reply

        A purpose in life does tend to change one’s life doesn’t it?

        Thank you for commenting, Ocimar.

  • TFRStaff 2:36 pm on 2016-12-05 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , juvenile deliquency, parenting   

    Hugh’s News & Views (Twenty-One Steps . . .) 


    Curtis Ramey was a gospel preacher, a practicing attorney in Fort Worth, TX, and, before that, a Juvenile Judge in Madison County (Huntsville), AL. Over forty years ago, brother Ramey wrote an article titled “Twenty-One Steps to the Electric Chair,” “Or, How to Raise a Juvenile Delinquent.”

    Nineteen states now have no form of capital punishment and another four have a Governor’s-imposed moratorium on capital punishment. Of the twenty-seven states that still execute criminals, lethal injection is the most common, but the electric chair is still an option in four states and the backup form of execution in Tennessee if lethal injection fails.

    We hear little today about the problem of juvenile delinquency, probably because it is no longer a politically correct term. But we still have young people who are guilty of heinous criminal behavior.

    So, while the title of brother Ramey’s article is now a bit dated, his points are still relevant. We run it this week as a fitting sequel to Gus Nichols’ letter to his family at home that we ran last week. Here are the twenty-one steps. (More …)

  • Eugene Adkins 6:54 am on 2016-08-02 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , parenting,   

    Investing our time in our children 

    If I’m flying solo, I can mow our lawn in about 40 minutes.

    If I have a “co-pilot” (my daughter), the same job takes me about an hour.

    I think the extra 20 minutes will yield plenty of compound interest as I use it to create memories that will last the rest of my child’s life.

    Time is the most valuable thing a parent can spend on his or her child. While our culture is currently stressing to the max the importance of investing in/saving up for a child’s future education, I still believe, due to the fact that we cannot get it back, the simplest investment, when it comes to our children, is the most important one that affects the right now – our time!

    For us mortals, our time can start getting spread pretty thin if we’re not careful. There are only so many hours in a day after-all. And because of this, often times our children end up getting the short end of the stick … or maybe I should say the sort-hand on the clock, when it comes to the time we have available. I’m sure parents with multiple children and multiple obligations understand this very well. But the fact that we’re mortals stresses the importance even more so when it comes prioritizing the things we do in life; especially when it comes to the way we spend our time, and who we invest it in.

    And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.” (Deuteronomy 6:6-7)

    #children, #family, #parenting, #time

    • James McFerrin 7:29 pm on 2016-08-02 Permalink | Reply

      The little things count big. In celebrating my 80th birthday last weekend, my children’s memories consisted of events that I had forgotten about, but they remembered.

      • Eugene Adkins 6:15 am on 2016-08-05 Permalink | Reply

        That’s neat when that happens. Definitely the goal I have in mind. And a belated happy birthday too.

  • Eugene Adkins 4:36 pm on 2016-07-17 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , parenting,   

    Sharing our mistakes with our children 

    I can’t tell you exactly how my daughter knows that her mother and I have had a few auto-accidents between the two of us (all of which, with the exception of one, were our fault and when we were practically teenagers); but one thing I can tell you for sure is that for some reason, she likes for us to tell her about them as we’re driving down the road.

    I know the kiddo has seen an accident or two on the road. Maybe after she saw one of the accidents she asked if we had ever been in any.

    I guess it doesn’t matter exactly why she originally asked. I guess what matters is that we chose to share our mistakes with her…after-all, she wouldn’t have known about them unless we told her (we know it wasn’t grandma or grandpa that let the cat out of the bag).

    I suppose it’s important for a Christian parent to share their mistakes with his or her child. Age discretion and maturity obvious play a factor as to the timing and details.

    I believe there are certain matters that should remain between ourselves and our judge. But I also believe that it’s important for a child to know why they can privately trust God’s grace by openly explaining to them why we, as parents, need to do the same thing. Think about the conversations that David and Solomon must have obviously had…or Solomon and Rehoboam when it came to relationships!

    I do not give this advice in order to hand a child an excuse as to why they should be able to be free to make the same mistakes as his or her parent – to the contrary! Sharing our mistakes with our children should be done in a way to help them understand why it’s important to follow the commands of our God and their God. For our goal as a parent must not only be to help them grow from young to old as our son or daughter; our goal as a Christian parent must also be to help our children become a brother or sister in Christ.

    My son, hear the instruction of your father, and do not forsake the law of your mother; for they will be a graceful ornament on your head, and chains about your neck. My son, if sinners entice you, do not consent.” (Proverbs 1:8-10)

    #learning-from-the-mistakes-of-others, #parenting, #raising-faithful-children

    • J. Randal Matheny 4:42 pm on 2016-07-17 Permalink | Reply

      It is good for parents not to pretend to be faultless. Important to own up to past and present mistakes, to ask forgiveness of children when they err. Good thoughts!

  • TFRStaff 5:37 am on 2016-06-24 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , , , , , , parenting, ,   

    June 2016 Issue of Christian Worker (Strengthening Families) 

    Here’s a link to the latest PDF issue of the Christian Worker.

    Here are the topics that you will find:

    • Why Strong Families are Important (Ben Moseley)
    • A Solid, Spiritual Foundation (Cody Westbrook)
    • How to Create a Distinctly Christian Family (Glenn Colley)
    • Husbands, Be Husbands (Jon McCormack)
    • Wives, Be Wives (Luanne Rogers)
    • Training Our Children (Matthew Gibson)
    • Serve the Lord Together (Michael Bonner)

    Christian Worker is an edification effort of the Southwest church of Christ in Austin, Texas.

    You can subscribe to the email version of the Christian Worker paper by clicking on the publications link on their website and then following the given instructions…or by clicking on the link provided here in The Fellowship Room under the “Friends” category to your right.

    Copyright © 2016 Southwest church of Christ, All rights reserved.

  • J. Randal Matheny 8:08 am on 2016-05-24 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , parenting,   

    Teach it at home 

    Ron T. has a good thought today on his blog, as usual, about teaching children, the next generation. I commented over there and said that parents are mostly derelict in their duty. Ron started a short list of what children ought to be taught:

    Some of the things that need to be taught young people (and older folk also) would be the historicity of Jesus, salvation from sin, the nature and importance of the Lord’s church, the day of judgment that is before us all. these are but a few very important points of teaching.

    What would you add to this list?

    Friends, we must teach at home. Fathers, that responsibility falls especially upon you, as the spiritual guides of the home. Plan what, how, when you’re going to do this. Give it much, much thought. It is the greatest and highest responsibility we have.

    Anyone familiar with a home curriculum for teaching one’s children the story of the Bible? Not homeschool material, necessarily, but something for an organized approach for parents?

    Most parents do more planning for their vacation than they do for their children’s instruction in the Lord. There’s more movie watching and internet surfing than Bible reading. To the great shame of parents and to the children’s eternal danger.

    #home #parenting #teaching

  • Eugene Adkins 8:03 am on 2016-01-22 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , parenting,   

    The difference between making a mistake as a parent and failing as parent 

    Let’s face it; you can’t make it through life as a parent without making mistakes. And making mistakes as a parent doesn’t automatically equate to someone being failure at it…nor do the mistakes made by your children. But the two can be very closely related.

    Let me describe the difference:

    Your children making the same mistakes you did as a young person doesn’t make you a failure at being a parent. Your children making the same mistakes you did as a young person with your blessing makes you a failure at being a parent.

    Children are going to do things that are wrong – even when they know they don’t have the blessing of his or her parent. But for a child to gain a stamp of approval from a parent while they are doing something morally, ethically, financially or whatever is conceivably wrong is just plain wrong.

    Listen to this – the youthful mistakes of a parent does not give that parent’s child a right to make the same mistakes! A wrong from a parent’s past will remain a wrong for his or her child in the future. And we will fail as parents if we don’t understand this principle.

    Parents are there to be a guide for their children – a guide that hones the conscience by stepping in when a wrong decision is being made whether that child realizes it or not…and whether or not your conscience made the right decision when facing the same situation.

    There’s a world of difference between making mistakes as a parent and failing as a parent; but intentionally allowing our children to do the former puts us dangerously close to the latter.

    Now therefore, listen to me, my children; pay attention to the words of my mouth:” (Proverbs 7:24)

    And by the way – the above quoted words came from a parent who made huge mistakes in his life, and that’s why he gave his son the warning, not the approval, that he needed to hear when it came to the responsibility of making his own choices.

  • Eugene Adkins 6:55 am on 2015-11-11 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , parenting   

    Movie Review: Inside Out 

    Last night my family and I watched one of Disney’s latest movies, Inside Out. I was actually surprised at the quality of the movie. I’m not very keen on some of the actors/actresses who voice the characters, but, overall, the characters make for an animated movie that’s way more mature than childish…which is surprising for most modern-day Disney movies because when I say it’s mature, I mean it in a good way.

    The strengths:

    In my opinion, the movie will strike a chord with more adults than children when you get down to the root theme of the movie. (More …)

  • John T. Polk II 11:29 am on 2015-08-15 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , parenting, ,   

    8-14-2015 Truly Neglected Orphans 

    Christians can now pray David’s prayer: the wicked “have also surrounded me with words of hatred, And fought against me without a cause. In return for my love they are my accusers, But I give myself to prayer. Thus they have rewarded me evil for good, And hatred for my love” (Psalm 109:3-5 NKJV). Judgment upon the wicked may thus be: “Let his children be fatherless, And his wife a widow. Let his children continually be vagabonds, and beg; Let them seek their bread also from their desolate places (Psalm 109:9-10 NKJV). While fathers fiddle with their iphones and ipads, with email, LinkedIn, YouTube or Fantasy Sports, their children are “fatherless.” While mothers use Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, or Pinterest, their children are “vagabonds, and beg” for love and attention. Children of the wicked, need parenting!

    This is Johnny Polk, with “Words of Wisdom” brought to you by the Oneida church of Christ.

  • Eugene Adkins 7:01 am on 2015-04-29 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: Baltimore riots, , , parenting   

    Parental Guidance not suggested – it's necessary! 

    In one way or another you’ve probably seen or heard something about the riots in Baltimore. One of the most controversial elements to this sad situation is the number of school-aged children and young adults who participated in the destruction of the public and private property of individuals who had nothing to do with the situation that sparked the events. Seeing such involvement could make one ask, “Where in the world were the parents of these kids?” Were they out there chucking the rocks with them? Were they lied to when they asked their child where they were? Did they even care enough to ask, or check? Well I can’t answer those questions for every underage rioter (as if there is a proper age to riot) that was present, but according to one news story one mother took note and she took action!

    The mother-and-child moment that was caught on camera led to this quote:

    An individual mother-and-child incident like this one is the best way to get these violent groups to listen, according to ABC News contributor and former FBI agent Steve Gomez.

    “If you get them separated, and you get their family member, someone they respect, to lay into them,” he said. “I don’t think that they’re going to listen to anybody other than their parents or someone in their family that they respect.”

    Parental guidance suggested? No way! Life isn’t a movie. Parental guidance is necessary for any kid that society needs to grow up into a young and responsible adult. The kids that participated in the riot were old enough to know what they were doing; now whether they were taught to do better remains to be seen, and the answer to that relies solely upon the shoulders of the parents whose roof those kids live under. If kids don’t learn to respect their parents, they won’t have any respect, true respect, for the public in general. And it’s not the general public’s responsibility to teach a child to respect his or her parents – it’s the parents! Even if the general public and governmental authorities must follow through with the consequences. So the FBI agent is right, but only to the extent that the child even has an adult in their life that deserves, or better yet commands, the respect that is necessary to take a rioter’s rock out of their hand by putting the rod of discipline across their backside or upside their head, as was the case of the afore-mentioned mother.

    I for one say good job mom! I don’t know you, but I know you loved your child enough to act, and I hope the lesson that you were trying to teach sinks in for your son’s and for society’s sake.

    *as an editor’s note, let me add that I don’t necessarily endorse the language that was used in the video, but I do endorse a mother who decides to take action when their child is doing wrong

    • J. Randal Matheny 7:33 am on 2015-04-29 Permalink | Reply

      Funny, I didn’t hear a single criticism of the mother for her physical discipline of her son. Is there no law in Maryland against it? She walloped him some good ones!

      • Eugene Adkins 6:44 am on 2015-04-30 Permalink | Reply

        I’ve heard a syllabus or two in favor of it but not a single syllable against it.

        And yeah she got some good shots. I’m sure the I in her boy’s pride has been quite a bit smaller the last few days.

  • Eugene Adkins 7:11 am on 2015-03-18 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , , , parenting   

    Discipling a child who does wrong 

    A public school in Portland, Oregon has garnered the ire of some parents due to the discipline that was meted out on their children through a corrective action based program aimed at bad behavior.

    So why the ire? It’s not because their child was given extra homework or because they were suspended in any way or because they were “assaulted” physically with a paddle. The school had obviously decided that these punishments don’t deter or correct the bad behavior. The ire came because this particular punishment “humiliated” their child. And what was this “humiliating” punishment that crossed the line? Let me provided you with a quote from the story:

    The “community service” program, called off at the César Chávez K through 8 school while the Portland Public Schools district investigates, reportedly punished misbehaving kids for unruliness (such as throwing food) by having them do chores that included picking up trash from hallways and paper towels from bathroom floors.

    That sounds dreadful! How could something like that happen in America? This is the 21st century! And while I’m at it, will someone cue the soft and solemn sound of a violin please?

    I’m no advocate of child abuse. I can’t be more staunchly opposed to it! I believe an individual should be punished to the extent of the law when an avenue of punishment creates unreasonable or irreversible damage to a child. But my friends, the only thing that will last beyond the day when it comes to the punishment of picking up trash in hallways and cleaning bathrooms is the lesson that was meant to be learned. If a little humiliation is what it takes for a child to learn not to throw food, or to disrespect a teacher or a fellow classmate then a little humiliation might be one of the best things that has ever happened to that child.

    A culture that fails to see the necessity of disciplining a child’s bad and disrespectful behavior is a culture that fails to see the adult that an uncorrected child will grow to become. And in case you haven’t noticed, it’s a lot easier to correct a child that still needs to learn a lesson than it is an adult who refuses to acknowledge the fact that what they have done is wrong. When you think about it like that, I guess humility isn’t such a bad avenue of correction for a child after all, huh?

    Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.” (Proverbs 22:15)

    • docmgphillips 11:11 am on 2015-03-18 Permalink | Reply

      And while we are at it, would it be so horrible to ask those on welfare (or whatever we call it now) to do menial jobs to “earn” their support?

      • Eugene Adkins 5:16 pm on 2015-03-18 Permalink | Reply

        While I wouldn’t equivocate discipline due to bad behavior to receiving welfare benefits, I would say a little honest work connected to the reception of wages never hurt anyone.

  • Eugene Adkins 8:04 am on 2015-02-28 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , parenting   

    What kids really want and need 

    I have today off! Meaning that I have no prep work to do for tomorrow. This is something that only happens for this preacher every couple of months, so when it does I usually try to make sure that family time gets marked down for the entire slot on Saturday. This being the case, I asked my 3-year-old yesterday what she wanted to do today. Her answer was, “Just play games with you.”

    Children want their parents; they really do (at least the ones a few years south of teenage-hood do…and let’s face it, most of the teenagers still want the same, they just don’t know how to say it anymore).

    Not only do children want their parents, children need their parents (especially those teenagers) in their life too. It’s as essential to their development as an adult as a well-balanced breakfast, exercise and education. It’s called structure. Believe it or not children need someone in their life that they can honor! Because when there is no one in their life to honor, dishonor usually follows their life.

    Science is still continuing to do studies that show how important both parents are to children, but the Bible closed the book on the subject a long, long time ago…parents need to be involved in their child’s life because that’s what they want, and that’s what they need.

    Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.”” (Ephesians 6:1-3)

    • Chris Barrett 9:00 am on 2015-02-28 Permalink | Reply

      Enjoy your day Eugene. Your 3 year old will be 13 like mine in the blink of an eye. We’ve traded in Candyland for Skip-Bo and uno. Still as much fun but they grow up fast.

  • TFRStaff 8:19 am on 2015-01-14 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , parenting,   

    January Spiritual Sword 

    By Hugh Fulford — The January 2015 issue of The Spiritual Sword is now in the mail. In my judgment this is another “landmark” issue of this great journal, dealing with an exceedingly timely theme, “Can We Save Our Children?” I am continually amazed at how Alan Highers, editor, always seems to come up with a “cutting edge” theme for every issue of this widely-read quarterly publication. (More …)

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